VERY SELF IMPORTANT. I had to do hospitality shit for his stupid band one time and he was kind of a shit to me and my co-worker. I just kinda ignored him but he was kinda snippy to my co-worker and she called him on it and he was all like... mockingly apologetic to her and then decided to turn on the charm and be…

I am not buying normcore accessories from the undeclared third Olsen twin. That is just not a thing that is going to happen.

Dang! If she gets into a fight at Litchfield she can just cut a bitch with those cheekbones.

U MAD, bro?

The sloshy bed at 1:30 is kind of grossing me out. Every night on that would sound like walking through a field of thick, very wet mud while wearing oversized galoshes.

But let's talk about that striped cat in the first clip. Am I crazy or is that an exceptionally good looking cat? Seriously, look at them stripes.

I'm curious.

Really just how I feel here.

Also note that the first letter of every paragraph spells out KIRBY DELAUTER. Genius.

<Cries into a thermos monogrammed K.D.*> That was beautiful.

Yes, it is cannibalism. Now that she's tasted human flesh (her own!) she's going to crave it, until the craving becomes too much to bear and she kills!

It looks like if one of the face huggers from aliens had a baby with a rare hamburger patty.

My wife and I are trying to have a baby. I'll be carrying the little gremlin (we're lesbians YAY) and she is planning on breastfeeding (with me). There are some hippie herbs you can take to make the boob juice happen, apparently. Anyway, she tells me the other night that not only does she think I should eat the…

FUCK YES

t h i s

Justin Bieber is cute. He could be sexy if he wasn't Justin Bieber. That is the problem. So, yes, it is not sexy.

That model draped over him... well, I'm sure she's normally quite beautiful but this is not a good shot, here. She looks like a mouthbreather.