From the original article:

Craft thread!

The father of the girl talking about how his daughter was scared to tell them about it is heartbreaking.

You missed the best part. Dear old dad is a registered sex offender.

He’s tall, dark and handsome, he plays for De La Salle, there’s a lot of girls that want to be with my son.

I used to have a Self subscription for years. But then it was too much about fashion and not what used to make it great: the health and wellness articles.  

Trump did, for one he fabricated.

Y’know, passing the Paycheck Fairness Act would be an even BIGGER step towards equality...just sayin’...but yeah sure draft women that’s good too I guess.

I’m firmly against this move, but it’s because I’m firmly against the draft regardless of gender.

HOW DARE YOU, THEY ARE PRINT-TO-CANVAS!!!

I’ve known people who got married only because they didn’t have the nerve to break it off beforehand, turn around a couple of years in (usually when they meet a more suitable person) and dump their spouse.

...her husband of one season, Mike Shay.

Oh I’m so sorry. This was me last year as my grandmother died thanksgiving week as well. It’s horrible, I’m sorry.

My grandmother died Monday. We’re still doing Thanksgiving because my mother refuses to pitch a perfectly good turkey, but I’m dreading it.

I bought a ridiculous amount of alcohol for this holiday. I can only manage one or two drinks usually anymore, but by god I’m going to do my best to stay buzzed all weekend.

Well, mom and I were supposed to go out to a restaurant with a friend of hers and her husband, but they bailed on us so fuck them. I’m making baked chicken, scalloped potatoes, corn pudding, bacon-wrapped asparagus and apple pie. Y’all are invited, but only if you bring more pie.

Breakfast: Buttermilk pancakes and thick cut bacon with mimosas for the adults

I can’t believe you’re doing all that work for orange cheeto people! You are a better lass than I...

I’m making spicy cheese crackers. You make a flat layer of saltines on a cookie sheet, you cover that with crushed red pepper to taste, then a bag or so of shredded cheddar cheese. Place in 500° oven which you promptlu turn off, don’t forget that part, leave it overnight and in the morning break up the crackers which…

Minus two pies, I’m fully in charge of Thanksgiving dinner tomorrow. I’m armed with a highly detailed cooking schedule and ready for it. I’m hoping being busy in the kitchen will excuse me from having to engage in political discussions with my family and guests, who are all (I think? Not sure about one guest) Trump…