My wife and I refuse to let that asshole interrupt our sex life. And now that pot is legal in CA...

My mom is barely two decades older than I am. She’s always looked young. Whereas I was one of those teenagers that had a five o’clock shadow at 13, which was coincidentally the same age I hit my adult height. Also: we look nothing alike, as I look exactly like my dad. You can probably see where this is going.

I am planning my exit from the country. No really, that’s what I’m doing.

Thanksgiving will not involve any extended family for us! Mostly because its my wife’s side’s turn, and her family won’t plan anything for unrelated reasons. Was going to suck, but now it’s awesome.

Tips for when you don’t remember names:

Punch-out deserves a much higher ranking. It’s essentially non-stop boss battles. Other than the weird “run through NYC” interludes, not one second is tedious.

This x1000.

Oh, hai GOP. Remember how you obstructed every fucking thing Obama tried to do?

All this. Fuck you Jill Stein, you fucking ignorant shit. We TOLD you about fucking Nader in fucking 2000, you were fucking AWARE that this shit could happen, and you still fucking ran your quixotic fucking campaign. Fuck you.

Dude Clinton voter here. Was not remotely a difficult decision.

Love that Gandhi is still an asshole. Love it.

“after publication, his PR team demanded that the magazine correct a claim that he supports Black Lives Matter, because caring about black lives is a bridge too far.”

I ride a subway (not in NYC). I always pay attention to what’s going on behind me when I’m near the track, for precisely this reason. Used to think I was being paranoid, but now I’m less sure.

Speaking as an attorney who regularly manages document reviews: you can totally review 650,000 documents in eight days, when those documents are electronic (like emails). Trump knows fuck-all about computers, but it’s a simple matter to set up and run filters to exclude irrelevant emails. For instance, if none of the…

Knowing a few lifetime Republicans, many of them are in denial about what their party represents.

It’s worth pointing out that Clinton is a centrist Democrat. It’s not like Navarro has to vote for a rabid left-winger.

This has got me thinking about how I might vote with my dick, and I’ve concluded it’s impossible this year. I mean, I think I could have swung it (heh) in 2008. But the 2016 options just leave me flaccid.

I fucking hate all those bromides.

Hey Mariah,

You mean Baby is the daughter of Doc on Buffy the Vampire Slayer?