I have used my "night out" babysitting to read and sleep more times than I can count!

I think next time, I will use the most condescending tone I can muster (won't be hard, I'm very good at it) and just say, "Really? How long have you been doing this job? And this is really the very first time you've ever heard someone say their birth control causes amenorrea? Must be something seriously wrong with…

A note to whoever is doing the baptism... if Justin somehow "accidentally" drowns during the baptism, I doubt anyone's going to investigate it all that much...

Where's Nelson Van Alden when you need him?

It's okay to be biased in favor of your roots. I tell people all the time that the prettiest place in the world is Yosemite, but I'm Californian and I refuse to listen to reason.

There is nothing subtle about that dress, therefore there is nothing subtle about the reaction to the dress.

It loosely translates to "Fuck all of you, I will do what I want."

I think people should be trusted with deciding for themselves whether they can manage in flip flops, or high heels, or whatever kind of footwear they prefer. But if you're going to ban flip flops, then you should also ban heels.

Flip flops are for a type of shoe, fraught with difficulty. You can easily fall down school stairs while wearing them and shouldn't be within a hundred feet of a science lab with the Bunsen burners and chemicals you will be carrying around. Also, a girl in my area wore them while driving, one of them got wedged under…

We do kind of have white history studies. Well, whiteness studies anyway. It looks into the social construction of whiteness as an ideology. It's a pretty interesting field, although it has a lot of the problems with more exuberant scholarship that you often get in new academic disciplines.

I didn't even know hem weights were a thing.

Im just happy that the wine fad is over so I can get a room in Yountville for less than the promise of my unborn children.

I ran it too! The course was amazing (even the small oil field partway through).

Maybe they're getting married BY Florence!

Exactly. Nearly 100% of professional dancers are built like her. Why just... hire one?

Yeah, I've been explaining that to a lot of people lately, but the money you pay out to people is a business expense. NEVER try to get away with not claiming/filing a 1099, because you can bet your bank account that the business filed it and the IRS knows you got that money. Because I've never met a business owner…

Actually, Dr. Phil, unless you're a trained fire fighter, when the house is on fire you should GTFO.