I remember laughing so hard at the comments one time that I literally had to walk away because my abs were hurting and I couldn’t breathe. Definitely my favorite old-timey column. Wish they’d bring it back!

I once shared an airplane row with a kindly elderly man and his pup--a two-month-old Czech mountain dog. He was rather large for a puppy and looked like this:

By the conclusion of Ms. Novic’s tweet saga, all my sympathy for her had evaporated as I arrived to the conclusion that she’s kind of an ass for putting this man & his eccentric doll on blast.

According to her son Moses who--surprise, surprise!, is currently estranged from her--Mia Farrow beat her adopted children, and would fly at them in uncontrolled rages with regularity.

You’re right dearest. Love the Pitt, can’t help it. Maybe now I can finally make my move.. =)

That smarmy, stubby-legged dork with bunk wannabe-hipster tattoos hotter than Brad Pitt? Like hell.

Exactly. Have these kids not watched any movies? Put Halloween spiders in her hair, for G*D’s sake. Spike her coffee with cork juice (or any other potent odorless/tasteless laxative). Make fart noises whenever she walks around. Pretend to be dumb and mute in class. Rub her car with bacon. Machete her garden. She’ll…

“..wrestling slightly”

Something along these lines. Good for him if he can swing it--but am disappoint in the NYT for the bullshit narrative. They usually stick at least one euphemistic line in there about “with financial help from a boyfriend,” or “thanks to relatives’/parents’ generosity,” etc.

I believe common wisdom goes as follows:

We’re not getting the whole story with that guy.

“My main bitch.”

Liz & Burton belong to the ages in these parts, for reals. Bummed I can’t find any gifs of the petrified young couple!

Is that pink lip gloss? Is he on barbiturates? Is the blown-out mullet supposed to affirm his heterosexuality?! Does he moonlight as Hannibal Lecter’s valet?

At least Tony will be the first to admit he’s never been great shakes as a chef.

They’re mortal enemies even. Foodgod = powerful dumb.

COL: CHORTLED OUT LOUDLY.

Nope, you’re just dandy. Your response made me giggle--and the Partridge idiot can suck it.

Yes! YES. Rafe is one of the true greats. I occasionally quote his immortal line from In Bruges-- “YOU are an inanimate fucking object!.” I know someone who saw him for private yoga lessons, and the guy said he was floored by how perceptive, intelligent and a good listener Fiennes was. Having never done yoga, he…

Breach is one of my favorites. Chris Cooper freaking became Robert Hanssen. Such a cool performance.