I still love my Flying Spaghetti Monster. Bless his noodly appendage!

Why does my penis smell? WTF??????

I love some of the things people call their penises. Russell the one eyed love muscle is almost a good as one eyed pant worm.

I have a couple of family members who are M.Ds. Although it does not come up in conversation very often, both of them have remarked to me that if you want a bigger dick, you need to change your parents and since that is impossible, get over it.

I am 61 years old and refuse to pay that kind of money for coffee. Having said that, My wife and I shared a large starbucks coffee once when we were stuck in an airport in Missouri.

I really do not think this jerk should get out of custody-jail-prison EVER!

As a man, I love Rachael, cause she and I probably have the same taste in women.

My sons all had great childhoods and now adulthoods. My sons got into Shel's poetry when they were in middle school. Had a couple of his books with his drawings. Loved his work. He drew with so much personality. Need to check out online and see what's out there. Hadn't thought about him in years. Great article. Thanks

Artie's face reminds me of a bowl of oatmeal. Anyone else get that?

So I am Nacho daddy?

My wife says you always hurt the one you love and her favorite move is "Bound and Determined"

My fantasies have evolved over the years. And I am not going to share them with you regardless of how you tie me up, hang me from the ceiling, suck my toes and stick a popcicle in my ear, speak to me with a Latin accent. wear Channel NO 5 and fill my mouth with Nutella. Not a chance. Never share. Gentlemen do not…

My number 3 son and his wife, son and dog live in a rental. Part of their deal was to show the place to prospective tenants when they were leaving. No problem so far. Two different women called my daughter in law about when they could see the cottage. One of them showed up and liked the place, the other one called…

Do you know what happens when you give a lawyer Viagra? Answer: they get taller. How do you get a lawyer out of a tree? Answer: cut the rope. What is the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a slimy scum sucking bottom dweller and other one is a fish.

I can never see any reference to E.T. without thinking of Cheech and Chongs reference to E.T. he was the horniest guy in their high school. His name was Eddie Torries and he had 3 balls. E. T. = Extra Testicle.

Back in the late 80's we lived in a really nice house in St. Francis Woods, San Francisco. The house was solid and the doors all fit perfectly. Our two youngest sons shared a bedroom next to ours. Sometimes, we would shut their door at night. Most nights the door would open itself. We later learned that an elderly…

For those of you interested in a low carb sleeping aid: 1/3 cup Flax seed flower, one egg, 1/2 teaspoon baking powder, 3 packets splenda, 1 tablespoon olive oil, 3 tablespoons of powdered coco powder, 1 tablespoon giggle week butter. mix in a coffee cup, microwave on high for one minute, cool in refrigerator, slice…

I brine then smoke highly addictive turkeys between Thanksgiving and New Years. Beware, the first one is free . . .

It does not take a rocket surgeon to know "Smell your kids candy before you let them eat it"

Not talking about birth control and abortion and hoping for the best is kind of taking the seatbelts out of your 17 year old son's Camaro with the thought that this will make him drive safer. BS