+1 Nice work.

-1 doesn’t use caps

Mooooooooo-oooo(se)!

Now that is an odd sort of beast. Are those prehensile labia?

Former stewardess for Swissair?

There’s a lot of money around... Bet you can find plenty of people who’ll gleefully claim to work there if given the chance.

Good point. He’ll be resurrected, if for no other reason than he’ll some day be the lone member of the Swiss Comedy Hall of Fame.

Which are mostly deflated by now.

No, that’s a mismatch:

Good point.

Hmm. Perhaps we’d better just call the dunkee, “the person of your choice.”

You’re right about that.

Not even $10M worth of Detrol can stop them now!

He meant the Mama’s and the Papa’s, but his spellchecker was born too late.

Threesomes don’t sound very safe, either.

It’s a leading cash crop in certain states.

What if you see it shoot a tennis ball 50 feet and hit a small target, dumping a politician into a pit filled with chicken shit?

If only... More like “Abandon Chastity....”

They all have staffers who interned with Blatter or Goodell. (Only The Onion has one that interned with Jack Warner.)

* Hope I can find a Solo beer cup to pee in.