Mock me not!

You can use potato chips if you don't have the Fritos

Ohmygod. Never Light Mayonaise. Never. Thank you for correcting me. Spread lightly since there is mayonnaise in the horseradish coleslaw ... you don’t want to overdo it too much. I do love me some real Duke’s Mayonnaise. To like any other brand is like saying you like Trump..

Thanks so much! But get this one: fresh pumpernickel, light mayonnaise (and I agree Dukes is the best) rare roast beef, some horseradish coleslaw, Boar’s Head Swiss cheese, grilled ... with real butter.

Sweet jeebus! Did God not bless you with any creativity? Please don’t tell me that your meat of choice is bologna.

Sister, when i pair that with a cold glass of milk, my body shudders and tingles like it did the first time I. ... well, it’s good. Your different opinion is all fine and good, but I have not heard about your rebuttal sammich. What you playin' with, what you got?

I’m confused by your emotion. Are we tootin’ on the same caboose, or are you on one of those Chinese magnet trains going in the other direction?

Don’t cry, baby. It’s just a sammich.

Best sammich: white bread, peanut butter, grape jelly, handful of Fritos, smushed.

Yes?

I’d jerk his turkey.

Utterly crazy. Those peeps should moove.

That you don’t vote for Donald Trump.

That’s like a bad Steve Martin impression from the 70's.

This is the important question: Are his teeth real?

Trash article, Ellie Shechet.

How big are the baby’s hands?

Sorry I didn’t answer sooner, but I was busy Trudeauing to a photograph of a shirtless Justin Trudeau.

I am one of the dorks who follows him on every social media account. He is both real and funny.

Wilda, there’s a parade in Topeka... and right now the forecast is sunny skies. If you hurry you might make it.