Honestly, I’d be scared of some rando coming to me on the street. Especially if you are hated enough to have someone on the street just come up and tell you that. That’s why I haven’t sold myself out. Actually, that’s not true, give me Tucker Carlson money and I’d gladly let Catherine Keener serve me some of that…

Its printed on the cabin manifest.

Giannis is David Robinson or Hakeem Olajuwon. People now have this impression that those old school centers were slow Frankenstein monsters ambling around the court like better versions of Brook Lopez. It’s actually true, they were exactly like that because they were 30 years old. This is what David Robinson looked…

Fuck the Suns and Steve Nash’s bloody nose.  That’s better.

Ice cream in a cup with a sugar cone stuck in it like a hat. Use the cone as an edible spoon.

People aren’t watching the French Open for the tennis. They are watching to be entertained. Press conferences are a part of that. I don’t know about you, but there are countless times I’ve had to eat a lot of shit because my job requires it. If you don’t like it you can quit, which Naomi has done.

I’m wearing an N95 mask on flights from now on regardless if COVID is a thing.  

I don’t know if I like the term “abuse” to describe this. Prince was tiny. At 5'2" 125, he was smaller than most women. When you are the same size, it is a fight.

What you are looking for is a microwave. Get that big piece of chicken going in the microwave first then finish in the air fryer. Same thing with pizza. Microwave then toaster oven.

I live in suburban San Antonio, so I can’t go more than a mile or two in any direction and find a gas station. So, I usually just go by the light. If I’m feeling extra finicky, I’ll only fill to half tank to try and save on vehicle weight. I know in some of the other cities I have been like on the East coast or even…

“salad,” “lemons,” and “ass” - Daily Beast

buffalo sauce is hot sauce and butter

San Antonio’s best Laundramat/Car Wash/Patio Cafe/Life Music Venue, The Cove, has a BBQ Jackfruit sandwich that tastes just like pulled pork. It’s the only thing I’ve had that is meant to imitate meat that actually tastes good. The other’s like Beyond and Impossible taste like a box of Sysco football stadium burgers…

Oh contraire. Restaurants tend to way over salt. I really noticed it during the pandemic when stopped eating restaurant food. It’s like a detox from the ridiculous amounts of butter, salt, and sugar they put in the food.

This is 100% from an erectile disfunction ad.  

You need to visit Britain.  They are a people who invested every single ounce of culinary development into meat based pastries to the detriment of every other type of food (except for cheese, they do make good cheese).  

Rent downtown is a nightmare.  Much of the Keep Austin Weird era businesses have moved out, died, or gone corporate.  

Better player.

That’s a good idea.  Now, what would you do if the penny were missing?

You could use that same argument other Christmas movies. “It’s a Wonderful Life” is less of a Christmas movie than “Die Hard”. It is about a working class stiff trying to undo the evil machinations of a high class thief and eventually realizing that by the end of the film how important and rewarding his family is. The…