Capitalizing on everything is the American way.

Like in the Meg?

I wish I had your kind of optimism.

See, I just thought he was being punny.

This is true, I remember seeing it on a rerun.

We know it was your cousin.

If only this was true. Anything to get them to break up.

I enjoyed lassoing people and dragging them behind my horse until they were dead, but yeah, the scenery was good too. Different strokes...

He looks like a ‘70's Pan Am steward who woke up with his mustache gone after an amyl binge during a Miami layover.

Fuck Chad every damn day!

They could easily make some money off of this if they marketed it right.

I thought they were so you can send a terrible gift to people that you secretly hate, but can’t be accused of being a bad person, just bad at selecting gifts.  You know, like a gift for your mother-in-law.

Fox viewer’s burning question on this is how could there have been anyone migrating anywhere over 6000 years before God even made the world in the first place?? 

Their live shows are great, can confirm.

I just saw them live last month for the second time and they’re still awesome! They played a lot of classics, but mixed it up pretty well and (except for that Africa cover) I’d say it was overall one of the best concerts I’ve ever been to. 

...and throw salt on when they won’t leave you alone.

My kids wouldn’t even eat most of what he’s making. They’d be like, “where’s my PB&J?”

Agreed. Why not share this gem with everyone:

It’s unfortunate I don’t have a star to give you for each of those pretentious kid names.