You don’t inspect?

Sorry Leo, 1996/97 you would’ve been able to get away with that bullshit, but not anymore.

True story: my 70-year-old father (well, he was a couple of years younger at the time) saw MGMT in concert and hated them. When he told me, I was so flabbergasted I couldn’t speak for a second, and then I said “WHY did you see MGMT?” Turns out they were playing and he was bored, so he went to check them out. I mean,…

2 things:

This finally answers the question as to why Jack never climbed up on that door with Rose; clearly he was too lazy.

But did you inspect it like Khloe? That’s my fave thing I’ve ever seen in one of these magazines.

I scrolled down while simultaneously digging in my nose only to see a whole page devoted to celebrities who were also digging in their noses. Stars REALLY ARE just like us.

Always listen to your gut when your gut laughs maniacally thinking “wow this will not end well for them” and be as firmly blasé in your rejections as possible.

High five heartbreakers! In high school I broke a boy so bad his friends had to have an intervention to tell him I would never ever love him. After they told him he was so upset he threw up. Then 15 years later I married him. Shows what his friends knew.

I turned it down as, in my own words, the first date would have ended with one of us going home in a body bag, and even if it did turn out well, it would have ended with me calling the first boy my “baby brother” every chance I got, and their father hitting on me shamelessly every holiday dinner. Lose-lose, in my…

You’re right. I think I just think “celebrity ally”. There are plenty of celebrity LGBTQs who aren't great allies to the community. My brain is burnt and I can't think of the right word. Leader? Archangel?

Haha in an unlikely turn of events, someone just recently attempted to hook me up with his older brother.

You say he’s a delight, I say he’s trying to destroy my leprechaun-hunting business. Fucking physicists.

His heart, mind, and soul.

This quote is how we got my 95 year old Grandpa to join twitter. He follows NDT, The Cool Pope, Potus and Bill Nye.

If you want a Neil DeGrasse Tyson t-shirt I recommend this one.

Lady Gaga gave a very emotional speech last night at the LA vigil. She read all the names. She probably has an emotions hang over from being a genuine ally and a kick ass human being.

You suck, Dick.

I’ve always found it ironic that Nixon would probably be considered one of the better post war presidents, were it not for his inherent lack of belief in his own ability to win the election, a belief that drove him to wiretap the competition in the first place. In terms of legislation and foreign policy, he got stuff…

Zombie how do you get around the washy washy thing if you’re a sweaty oily beast of a person who works out every day and sleeps in ponytails?