“I don’t know what kind of business you’re in, but I tell ya what, if I was a head of a newspaper, and you didn’t do your job, you’d be held accountable.”

The saddest part is that he will be able to recall each of these moments perfectly for the rest of his life. Meanwhile J.R. Smith can’t remember the score for more than three seconds.

This is the kind of content that really separates Deadspin from other sports websites. Well, this and athletes’ penises.

And signed till 2022.

I don’t think I’m in a position to make fun of them when we have Chris Davis regularly starting at first.

This isn’t yet true for the middling Toronto Blue Jays, who are currently treading water at 25-29

It’s barely meat, but yes.

You buy your meat at the Food & Stuff, like Ron Swanson?

I don’t know, that seems awfully cheap for a sandwich.

Clint Capela is called the “Pancake Emperor” (饼皇) because in Chinese slamming home alley-oop lob passes is called “eating pancakes” (吃饼).

*continually restarts the video at 00:14*

Last time I held a CD? Last week.

OK so the hipsters have come for DVDs now. Can anyone remember they last time they held a CD/DVD? No they can’t because it’s fucking stupid. If someone handed me a CD and said “Watch this!” I would throw it in the trash. We now have the ability to directly beam photons in the form of movies and TV shows anytime,…

Yeah right, like i’m just gonna pop in Heat on my dvd player for a 4 hours break on a wednesday night.

I really want to know what everyone is trying to accomplish here by fighting racism with more racism. You want to put down the fans for being racist, but then refer to them as “white trash” or typical “white” people. Kind of kills your argument doesn’t it? I think there’s a lot more important issues we should focus on…

“I should be playing instead of that other guy.”

I had to stop reading about halfway through. This is why I don’t date anymore. Most men think this is what sex is. This isn’t sex. This is snuff.

The problem is that dinner is too early, not leaving room for a proper tea time. And Americans only eat three meals a day and too many snacks. When kids get home from school in many countries they have tea time with tea or coffee or chocolate milk and toast with butter and/or jam.

Cue oblique strain in 3,2,1...

I have the urge to smash this skull with a bat until it no longer inhabits the dark recesses of my subconscious, is that close?