Those marks were so desperate for someone to validate their crazy fucked up ideas that they believed I gave a shit about the. Such losers. So sad. So bad.

Alec Baldwin movie fails again. What a loser. Sad!

Heinz is in bed with John Kerry.

I like my Trump steaks to be as tough and leathery as my huuuge bulbous ass. Shoe-leather!

It will be the best, bigly speech ever. I plan on using up to seven different adjectives because my brain is so big. Winning!

Failed lesbian Rosie O'Donnell can't stop losing and…

Is that wrong? Should I have not done that?

Any questions?

Jimmy Fallon is unfunny.

This guy has it right.

I like POWs that weren't captured.

LOUD NOISES!

Cats!

Wrong. Pretty sure pandering to nazis got me elected.

Don't listen to failed ponies.

And Nuuu-Wom!

Web browser? Is that Twitter?

Wrong. You ain't coming in to America. Banned!

Failed Brit so-called host Jon Oliver is already tired of me winning so much. NPD is unrelenting and compulsive. You all will be exhausted. Tremendous!

UR late.