Who says I don't care? I enjoy knowing so I can laugh at him. And why on Earth would I want to "take out" the Bat? He's so much fun!

The riddles used to like you, too, nintendo historian.

Good God, Zsasz, you bought that amnesia story? I just made that up so every two-bit hood in town wouldn't come after me begging to know who the Bat was. I NEVER FORGOT. But if everyone else is too dumb to figure it out, they don't deserve to know.

RIDDLE ME THIS, AV CLUB!
Why am I so awesome?

You more or less have it, Larry, but a little more artful, if you please. I was going for something along the lines of "He won't appear in front of women without a rug." Style counts!

You know, it occurs to me that one would have to have actually watched Night of the Ninja to correctly answer my riddle here. This may cut down on responses.

Interesting thought, Zsasz, but the last thing I need is a horde of imitators. If I did that, you just know one of them would get ideas above his station and decide to replace me or outdo me or some such nonsense. No, I'm content to simply keep track of the Bat's franchise members so I have someone to annoy when I'm…

RIDDLE ME THIS, AV CLUB!
Here's a nice low difficulty one, for two low-quality episodes. Why is Batman like a shy bald man?

Hmm, yes, I do like that phrasing better. Truth be told, I quite enjoy matching wits with Robin. His cheery attitude is refreshing after another battle with ol' grumpy-bats. Robin at least brings a good sense of fun to the table, and fun is why I do this in the first place.

That does it. For failing to get my joke and making an even worse one, Dowd wins an all-expense-paid trip to the Pain Room! Enjoy!

Not bad, Dowd, though I'm curious what bar you go to that serves a shot big enough for its entire clientele.

Ha! Everyone is wrong! The answer is… a net! Hunters trap their prey in it, mosquitos are foiled by it, professional acrobats (like the Graysons) do without it, and it brings us all together on the AV Club! HAAAAHAHAHAHA!

Sounds like a fun weekend, Zsasz. Although, really, considering the most recent Arkham administration, would being run by the Joker be all that much of a change? It seems like that place is only ever run by the inmates. Oswald's lucky he gets to go to regular prison.

RagingBear is incorrect but made me laugh, so no penalty.

RIDDLE ME THIS, AV CLUB!
What is it that separates hunter from prey, parasite from host, and professional from amateur, yet brings us all together?

Yes, well, I'm sorry for the terrible brain damage you must have suffered to believe that your answer was at all worthwhile. To answer your question, though, I envision a tasteful wall decoration to remind me of all the fun times I've shared with the Bat. And perhaps a last-minute Halloween costume.

Oh, for- really? THIS is the one that stumps everyone? All right then. The answer is — The (Rube) Goldberg Variations! HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Eugenics in this day and age? Ridiculous. I look forward to Bats giving the fool a good pummeling.

I suppose that's appropriate, Zsasz, but not the answer I had in mind.

RIDDLE ME THIS, AV CLUB!
What music does Josiah Wormwood like to listen to while building his elaborate traps?