Who?

Pinelli, Fellini, Martini, Bikini…

Aaron Pierce is Jack Bauer from an alternate future.

SJP looks like her face caught on fire and someone tried to put it out with a large rubber mallet.

Steve Higgins is also the Santa Claus that wanted to kill Bill McNeal on NewsRadio.

Fulcrum's motives?
Yeah, we know they're a bunch of "bad guys"—whatever that means—but I'd like to know exactly what it is they're trying to accomplish. Because it seems like they're mostly a lot of ex CIA types who want the Intersect to do…what? Overthrow the government? Sell it to the highest bidder? Kick ass on the…

This means I have to take down my Whitesnake poster, doesn't it?

They've hired the California Raisins as their mercenary death squad.

*sits in the shower, sobbing*

I'M A MONSTER!!

When you go to the toilet later, you can just say you're leaving a giant Whoopi in the bowl. Or "pinching a Hasselbeck," if you prefer.

Where are the Jetsons?
They're part of MY rock and roll fantasy.

I can't be the only one who wants to hear more about the goings-on at Jessica Rabbit's all-girl apartment, can I?

OBAHAI
Wait… this isn't a story about those adorable cats who enjoy cheeseburgers and can't spell?

Only in Svenborgia.

Oh yeah, AJR? Well, my MOM is retarded!

"Giddyup, ba-oom-papa, oom-papa, mao-maoooooo…"

La boHAM.

Hoisted by my own petard.

It ain't over till the fat lady sings.
Fortunately, that'll likely be the first number.