He really made a jackass of himself at the Oscars.

Death Proof really sucks dick…I watch Tarantino's films because even if they suck, they're still interesting, but I don't want to see Death Proof ever again (and I watched it twice to make sure it really did suck). I kept thinking, "There's no way he'd get away with this shit if his name wasn't Tarantino."

Two other favorites of mine (one of which was used in an AV Club article today):

Mine might be when Winston Wolf silently acknowledges that Jimmy's coffee is indeed high-quality.

It's sort of like Kevin Smith and "Clerks." All us 17-year-olds went bananas when we saw "Clerks" because nobody was making references to Star Wars or Burt Reynolds or any of the stuff from our childhood that we were just getting old enough to feel nostalgic about or make fun of. Now that the whole world knows that…

Mine was Top Gun.

It looks more like "gub."

Yeah, "nothing to see here" has pretty much described Simpsons for the last decade

"The next nominee for Playa Hater of the Year: Pitbull! Pitbull is nominated for calling the cops on the drug dealers who moved in down the hall…not because it was the right thing to do, but because he was jealous of all the money they was makin'! And the final nominee for Playa Hater of the Year is Silky Johnson. …

Didn't he call Kirshner "a sexy little piece of jailbait"?

I don't think I'd be able to resist screaming, "I get my kicks ABOVE the waistline, Sunshine!"

I just had a horrible realization…the chick in the pic above is really Jesse Eisenberg in a Cleopatra wig.

Roger Dodger was a really good movie. What's Campbell Scott up to now?

Oh yeah…and doesn't she say something about how riding a bike tickles her…womanly parts? (errrrrwwwwwwww)

A run-by fruiting.

Hope he doesn't have a wood floor…I bought several big glass bongs (including one in Venice, though not six feet tall) in my day and I'd end up brushing against one when going back to the freezer for more fistfuls of Jelly Bellys and it'd shatter.

I want them to bring back Iron Jay and Billy Tuttle.

I had that one as well as "The Disney Films."

I don't blame them for it…it just makes me uncomfortable to have girls out of my league pretend that I'm attractive.

"I love the sexy slither of a female snake. OH BABY."