No blonde too vapid for Putin!

Kathy Griffin, gone. Trump staff workers, two. Yeah, great values there on CNN.

That's, like, a professional pretty person on two levels!

She was a professional pretty person, the most talented of Americans!

Montana is a perpetual skinhead biker rally disguised as a state, so you gotta consider that.

In my day, this was known as pulling a "Shelley Long." I believe it's nowadays referred to as a "Childish Gambino."

It's certainly not because they did that better than she did. No, it simply MUST be misogyny!

Clearly, you had had enough of Ashlee Simpson by the time she was on SNL.

Whew! I was afraid there'd be no room left in the world for the lazy wealthy to continue their vanity projects.

Thanks, again, for Sarah Palin, Keating snitch.

"…And I'm responsible for One Direction, to give you some context!"

A model most famous for gaining weight and getting pissy after being called out for it isn't the ideal judge for talent, one would imagine.

It's too hard to translate "poopyhead" into Arabic.

HW's body count and Machiavellian nature isn't quite something I'd call bland.

Why's he apologizing for telling the truth? Isn't the problem that broadcast journalism has Colmesed itself into impotence for access?

Imagine if those posh twats ever had to lower themselves to get one of those jobs that they've been told slowly kill you!

No, Hillary tanked Hillary's campaign, unlike her Democratic primary performance, all by herself.

No, it's a crime, but so's outing a spy's identity over a vendetta, so's torture of noncombatants, and are you familiar with the term "criminal negligence?" If your negligence kills over 3,000 people in one day, that fits the bill, doesn't it?
I didn't mean to say that sexting a teen isn't wrong, but the current…

I forget. How many people are dead as a result?

Yeah, and when's that Mooslim yoosurper Obama gon' show his birth certificate?!