Warren Oates is a condescending prick. Please give us more education on what is good and what is not. Or cram something large and jagged up your ass.

Rapture
I was in Milwaukee and saw a bumper sticker that said "Warning: In case of rapture, this vehicle will be unmanned"

Rapture
I was in Milwaukee and saw a bumper sticker that said "Warning: In case of rapture, this vehicle will be unmanned"

Wrong, Trent Dilfer rode that defense to the championship. You're oversimplifying what I'm saying. Wade lead the Heat to a championship, something Lebron has been unable to do. Trent Dilfer just didn't fumble or throw interceptions enough to lose a game. You could probably take snaps with the Ravens defense on the…

Shazbat! you're right. He really didn't do a damn thing though.

Championships
Although I think it's a matter of time, I'd like to remind everyone that Dwyane Wade is the only player from the Lebron-Carmelo-Darko-Chris-Dwyane draft class to win a championship. Until Lebron wins he will always be inferior to Dwyane in NBA accomplishments. Wade made defenses look silly in that…

The best Walker Texas Ranger clip they showed was Chuck Norris punching out some woman while struggling with her in a car. He straight up decked her in the jaw, K.O.-ing her. Conan was aghast. Then replayed it.

End of "me first era"?
I didn't realize refusing the shake the hands of your opponents who just beat you in the playoffs and then defending your poor sportsmanship by saying he's competitive and therefore does not feel compelled to shake his opponents hands in defeat was the end of the "me first era". Silly me.

Random
Claire Zulkey, did you go to Loyola Academy for high school?

The best line from old time baseball came when an airplane flew over the field and Conan points at it and shouts in angry terror "What sort of devilry is that!?"

Prog metal grunge works for me. Listen to Gun on Louder than Love. Proggy! Heavy! Grungy!

Soundgarden was way more metal than "art grunge". What the fuck does art grunge mean and how is it any different than punk grunge, classic rock grunge, party grunge or whatever other stupid arbitrary division you're making. Listen to Badmotorfinger and get back to me.

yeah, you can't give a girl a rusty trombone. There is nothing to imitate the motion of moving a trombone slide back and forth. This is a shitty, lazy hater post. A quick jump to urban dictionary would have prevented this.

Towelie, that's all members of the band and all of their fans.

Guilty! And John Barleycorn is one of the worst bars in the entire world. I'm happy to know that its clientele in Chicago is a bunch of transplants from Ohio. Tourists have no problem paying $6 for a miller light.

Curry gives you a migraine? That sounds like utter bullshit. Maybe you're just a cry baby who freaks out for two days because you smell something you don't like. Try working on a garbage truck. If the comforts of modern life suddenly stop, Banmar will be one of the first to die. What a wimp.

Fist fight
I know it's not the most nuanced or mature strata of debate, but don't you wish you could just fight Glenn Beck? I'd savor every moment my elbow crashes into his flabby cheeks, pushing through the layers of jowly blubber until elbow crushes cheek bone. Feeling his already over taxed arteries constricted…

Anyone who prefers boneless buffalo wings (which is actually breast meat) to actual buffalo wings probably has only had buffalo wings from Buffalo Wild Wings, which is like commenting on mexican food when only dining at Chili's. You know nothing about the subject you're commenting on and therefore your opinion is…

Kids are pussies. I can kick their ass.

mmmm…fluffernutter.