This movie will make at least ten times what our favorite movie of the year will make in its entire run.

…ew.

I wonder what's become of this Tyler…

MOTHER-DAUGHTER SCISSOR FIGHT

THIS AIN'T YOUR DADDY'S SUMMER!

"Summer isn't just for kids"?

Yeah, that's what I was thinking too. While I do think the patent troll thing has gotten out of hand, it's handing companies unchecked freedom to fuck some dude out of his invention, hire a high-priced law firm and stick him for the fees if and when he loses. Which creates an almost equal problem in the other…

I heard he did a heckuva job on the show.

It's OK for Adam Carolla to ask for a handout, because he's white and all…

The KISS Army Act: Killing the Innocent Sexy Schoolgirl Army Act

Come on, guys. The patent trolls have to make a living, too.

There's gonna be a remix album titled BARACK HUSSEIN OBAMACARE'S BANKRUPTING THIS COUNTRY AND LITERALLY RAPING OUR CHILDREN AND GRANDCHILDREN to really drive the reference home.

He porked Britney Spears when that meant something, married Jessica Biel, makes really good pop music after being in an awful-but-devastatingly-popular boy band, and agreed to be in Southland Tales despite it not really making any sense.

THERE it is.

"I HEAR HE'S BRINGING SEXY BACK!"

Ti West: "House of the Devil was pretty good, right?! Now I'm never going to do anything as good as that."

Bigger, Blacker, & Louis CK Can Go Fuck Himself

Louis (the Lewis pronunciation) is technically his name. We all just call him Louie.

I…. really?

It's my "Life is fucked but it's actually awesome" realization moment that comes every few weeks. Particularly "The House That Heaven Built."