People have been telling me for years that I need to write a book collecting my various stories that I've told here and elsewhere over the years. I just now decided that I'm going to do that.

I'm confused. If I go to the cops with a "sexual allegation," then they "will work with me"?

Remember in the beginning of Goodfellas when young Ray Liotta was selling cigarettes out of the back of that car and the cops choked him to death because of high cigarette tax rates? And then the movie just ended? Remember?

Definitely deserved that Grammy for best metal album.

Only if we're counting Jessica Alba's tits as two.

I would prefer not to.

I want his Pimp Cup.

Greatest quote of all time, from Creed's Brian Marshall (around 2000 or so): "Well, Eddie Vedder wishes he could write songs like Scott Stapp."

I cannot think of a single piece of news I'd care about less than this. Maybe, like, who won the 5th Grade Spelling Bee at the Southwest Regional Iowa finals or something.

It was Nyquillus Dillwad.

You could have some pretty awesome Furry sex in that suit.

I think it would be really funny if people started an internet campaign talking about how great Nabin's book is and how everybody should totally torrent it.

Ha. Haha. Hahahahahahaha! Oh, Nabin.

This book already exists. It's called The Bible.

This statement reminds me of the Collective Soul album
Hints Allegations and Things Left Unsaid, in that I have no interest in listening to either of them and wish they'd just stop being a part of the public consciousness.

That's not a bad thing; it can be a pain to have to make "here comes the airplane!" noises to get your cock in their mouth.

Aren't they all?

I'm sorry. On the bright side, I haven't had enjoyable sex in seventeen years! (I'm 34).

They all stayed sober :-(

I didn't have sex with a family member!