I just realized that Angelina Jolie would be amazing as the monster in a reboot of Alien.

Look, manly men everywhere, I've only got so much bandwidth, and right now it's all taken up with Chris Kyle and the people who keep reminding me on Facebook, Twitter, and the news that he was pretty much Uncle Sam, Rambo, and Audie Murphy all rolled into one. Bear, if you want my attention right now, you've got to do…

He has to hang out with Aziz Ansari? Come on, that's too cruel!

"Get a brain! Morans [sic.]"

"Goddamn sexual tyrannosaurus" made me pull a muscle laughing.

Honestly, I wouldn't hesitate to drop the big one there: Applebee's. That operation has proven successful not only at expanding everywhere, but evolving as it goes. They once focused on Chili's as their main opponent; but now that Chili's expansion seems to be in check, Applebee's has pivoted to making itself an…

Are frog legs permissible on Fridays during Lent?

Truly. At least Seth Rogen has stuck up for 'M'r'c'n freedom in the real world — and he's not even a 'M'r'c'n!

From a pure operations standpoint, I'd say ISIS leadership are amazing managers, since their expansion through the Syrio-Iraqi power vacuum last year was lightning-quick. We can disagree with the aims of their regime, but the way they get large numbers of people to get behind mass executions, including beheading enemy…

I prefer Freedom Frogs.

They are people…

Are you really asking?

Movies shot on the water are always disasters.

I come from the future just to let you know how horrible an idea that would have been.

To answer your question, if you're still interested, no. There is no such rousing speech to the troops. Instead, there is Noah's grim vision of what post-Flood life will be for these few humans who survive.

When I was teaching English in Eastern Europe, we had a British textbook from the mid-1980s that still used "Negro."

Like a Bossk.

What the fuck, autocorrect? I was typing that right before bed last night, so I didn't catch it.

They've got a good quarterback who looks like Sloth from The Goonies.

That equation sure looks like a license plate slyly trying to say "pervert."