GB and Ugly
Has nobody mentioned this yet? That circular gunfight in the cemetery belongs on everybody's short list of the most memorable things ever committed to film.

Law and Order: Confederate Slavetracker Unit.

Damn, I write a lovely firstie poem and all I get is snark.

So sad. . .
My tears would fill an aquifer
Streaks of mascara on my cheeks
Both butt and face

Law and Order: Gestapo Jewcatcher Unit
I predict Dick Wolf is reduced to dealing with the History Channel, with unsettling results. Keep telling yourself: they don't make the laws, they just enforce them.

I've always thought of liches as still being wizards. Liches retain their personalities and magical prowess from their mortal existence. Only real difference is they have become undead instead of mortal humans. To me that's still a wizard. For example - you could be an undead tax lawyer. Just because you're…

Right now he's beating the shit out of Michael Jackson in heaven, and they're both enjoying it capitally.

So what do you know about Elf? Perhaps the drunk actually asked a pretty good question, motherfucker.

You're at the opposite end of the line from the guy who is Last in Line.

Rock IS the Devil's work, AND it's magical and rad.

If the Crossing were a person it would be a mighty person who could and would beat up anybody who fucked with him/her.

If you find a copy you might want to spray some disinfectant on it before handling it. I remember some disturbing letters from fans. Please don't ask me for details.

@twogreattastes:

Yes, I know about Irving Berlin, and the comparison is total bullshit. When you transpose a keyboard part into a different key it totally scrambles all the fingerings and the intervals look and feel very different. Unless you know the keyboard like the back of your hand it's impossible to transpose a jazz piano…

Hey Hitler, I'm sure the Scots(and the Irish) would have been overjoyed to see you stick it to those bastard Englanders back in 1940. Is it too late to uncancel that invasion of England?

The Ramones couldn't change keys???
They couldn't play "Rock 'N' Roll High School" in a different key? How could they NOT know how to do that? I mean, their songs couldn't possibly be any simpler, and they could only play them in one fucking key? For real? It's mind-boggling. It's stuff like that that makes me…

Venom actually had a good sense of fun and humor in their music. It's a shame that Bathory so thoroughly won the debate regarding fun/humor in black metal. Bathory was unrelentingly grim from day one and that set the tone for the genre to this day. I still prefer Venom's vision. Devil-worship should be a blast,…

Didn't Krusty bang this chick back in the day?
Or was that Monty Burns?

They are gays
Each, individually, is a gay. Malkmus and Beck together are gays.

"Mac and Me" remake please
He MUST do a word-for-word remake of the original "Mac and Me" script. Don't change a fucking thing. Same direction, same costumes, same sets, same shitty visual effects, same everything. Then he can go on the Conan show to promote the film and the clips he shows will actually be from…