Have you tried slapping them any time they say something that displeases you?

…h-how long are you supposed to stay there? Forever?

So side boob and some tasteful lower back action? I'll take it.

"Speaking behind white people's backs in a language spoken by a quarter of the Earth (i.e. Mandarin) is not playing the good odds."

"White people, a warning: if there are Asians around you switching between English and their native language, there's a good chance they're making fun of you."

Translation: "I Googled the actress in preparation to rub one out and then found out she was 13."

You don't know that!

It's Glasgow. It's a distinction without a difference.

Incredibly it seems for once Florida Man wasn't involved.

How can he know it's the worst film he's ever seen without seeing it? Or hearing it?

"Having been to europe several times I have to admit a LOT of the rap people make over there (the stuff in English, anyway) is some perpetration-type shit."

Out of all the posts you should have apologised for and this is what gets it?

The lady is a bored housewife whose husband is lousy in every aspect important to being a husband. The dude is a generously equipped cad who she decides to have an affair with despite his history of womanising.

Seriously?

There's one part of me that knows I'm being unfair in judging her based on her playing the vilest person on the planet in that acapella film. But there's another part of me that knows that she was cast in that role precisely for those qualities…

This reminds me of how some people actually watched all of that film.

They were indeed capital knockers.

There's also D) He's trying to tell you the books are a soap opera, which are designed to go on indefinitely, and where there is a total lack of any grand arc… but you don't wanna hear that.

Simpsons Shostakovich already did it. Lady Macbeth of Mtsensk which contains the stage direction "And then they fuck". Worth it entirely for what the composer deems as appropriate musical expression of a flaccid penis slipping out of a vagina…

Relationship dramas are horrible.