Diabeetus' wrist implant checks his blood sugar so fuck you.

Guys. The interview? Not worth a read.

Scene, interior, cat's butthole

AV Club, don't you ever, EVER site Digg as a source. Diabeetus has spoken, so it shall be done.

DESIGNING WOMEN because Delta Burke carved in stone would give everyone raging boners, regardless of race.

"The wind doth taste of bittersweet
Like jasper, wine, and sugar
I'll bet it's blown through other's feet
Like those of Caspar Weinberger."

"Well, my brother's gay, so I know."

Bro…that's a paintball mask. Fuck. You.

NO ONE EXPECTS NINA HAGEN.

Diabeetus will mess your shit up good if you don't quit using high-falutin' words like "parable".

The message of this movie is to shut your goddamn piehole.

No one expects Diabeetus.

WAAAAAARRRR HOOOOORRRRSSSEEE!!! (neeeeiiiigggghhhh snort snort)

Probably not. But the spambots that are having sex with your mom are on point, son.

Diabeetus thinks we can all agree that 2009 was a painfully unfunny year for everyone.

I Am Dead (And You Can Too!)

JESUS CHRIST, DID THAT WINE GLASS BREAK OR NOT?!?

(+) (•) (+) (•)

Diabeetus doesn't have an hour just to watch explosions, The Internet.

Butthole Surfers - "Pepper"