ZMF is WHITE?!?
Diabeetus learns something new every day.

Diabeetus would argue that no one ever benefitted from a Humperdinck
Englebert or otherwise.

Diabeetus would like to add "taint".

Diabeetus does not believe that a 200-year-old vampire qualifies as a teenager.
That sounds suspiciously like pederasty to Diabeetus. Sparkly, abstinent pederasty.

Diabeetus does not consider the flaming hot despair that rockets from his anus after eating at McDonalds to be elegant.
Nor does he like the "McDLT". Why does it have to be hot AND cold?

Where Warbringer at?!?
Diabeetus found their 2008 album "War Without End" to be a ball-smashing good listen.

Diabeetus wanted to see more vampire-on-vampire baseball-bat-swinging beatdowns.
For a real vampire experience in film, Diabeetus recommends "Transylvania 6-5000".

Diabeetus approves of the artwork up there.
That Photoshop disaster up above the review byline is more awesome and more interesting than anything the show has done in years. Diabeetus is proud of you, Steve Heisler.

Diabeetus knows what love is.
But he won't do that. Oh no. He won't do that.

Diabeetus-mas
Now THAT'S a motherfuckin' holiday.

Diabeetus would like to hear from Barf Man.

What, no love for "The Nine"?
Diabeetus is incensed and offended. And hungry.

Not that it's any of your business but Diabeetus has 27 different (and awesome) mobiles.

Diabeetus tastes the rainbow of fruit flavors.
And it tastes like a good ol' fashioned ass-whompin'!
To the Steven-Tyler-Is-Back-Baby Mobile!!!

Barf Man, do you have a pamphlet or newsletter to which Diabeetus may subscribe?
*waits*

This cat reminds Diabeetus of a younger Diabeetus
Diabeetus was on the TV, you know…

Diabeetus Questions Why He Ate That Sandwich
Diabeetus Films presents A Diabeetus Joint Brought to You by Diabeetus

Diabeetus will be happy to spew a string of heartfelt obscenities.
Didja hear that, Hollywood?!? Fuck-a-doodle-do.

Diabeetus would like to show a little love for The Money Pit.
"Up. Down. PAAAAIINNT. Don't tickle. And don't smoke."

"The Futurological Congress" is Diabeetus' favorite work by Lem. It'll totally fuck your world up. Thus spake Diabeetus.