Break out your fisticuffs.  I'm not as anti-Burton-catalogue as some, but Mars Attacks! has a firm spot on my personal 10 Worst Movies of All Time list.

There's a kernel of good show hidden here, but yeah, it needs some major restructuring.  If the beginning of every week is a long segment about who can shove a ton of food into their gullets the fastest, I'm out.

No, he means he wishes there were 144 more well-adjusted transsexuals in the world.  Otherwise, he'd just be an asshole.

OK, so that Snow White and the Huntsman movie looks less terrible than I pictured, but I refuse to put a fraction of a penny into Kristen Stewart's pocket.  Which movie should I pay for before I sneak into that one?

Heh, I'm the reverse.  I can recognize that The Wedding Singer is a good movie, and still want him to be shot into the center of the sun.

Lacrosse is a hundred times more interesting than basketball, which has all sorts of movies made about it, so good news all around!  Congrats!

Wiggity-wack?  Or just the regular kind?

Hey, did you know that although Jack McPhee was gay, Kerr Smith is straight?  Yep, straighty, straight straightaroo!  Doesn't kiss dudes in his free time, and would really, really like you to know that.  Hey, do you have any friends or family he could ask you to pass along the message to?  STRAIGHT!

I definitely think you should continue.  These reviews put the series in a context that's not apparent watching episode to episode.  Plus, I selfishly want you to get at least as far as what I consider to be the pinnacle of Scrubs:  The "My Half-Acre"/"Her Story II" arc in Season 5.

I don't have a DVR.  I'm the saddest person in the world.

I genuinely adore Peggy Sue Got Married.  There must be half a dozen scenes of her simply reacting to seeing younger versions of her friends and family, and every single one of them gets me.

You all have hideous hair!  From a design perspective.

Dear Robert Pattinson's Acting Career,

Well, I liked Every Little Step and loved Spellbound, and this sounds like those two movies had a baby.  Count me in.

I saw a van with a libertarian, anti-government bumper sticker at the public library today.  It made me smile.

"I didn't know Gloria was sick!"

DIE, Fledermaus!

Blanche:  Every day, Marmaduke and Apt. 3G
Dorothy: I haven't read Apt. 3G since… 1961.
Blanche: Oh, well let me catch you up. It is later the same day…

And was also afflicted with one of the worst cases of Insufferable Child Syndrome in recent memory.

So you can make shady business deals, frame people, and indulge in manslaughter and still be described as a "good man"?