Although, it only really works if someone else says it about you. If you are the first to say it, you might run into a media shitstorm, like when John Lennon said that the Beatles were bigger than Hitler.

The appropriate term for that sort of girl is "Hipster Grandma"

Let's not forget Pink Panzer!

EddyTV? Iron Maiden has their own fucking network, and I'm just now finding out??!?!?!?

Did you know that horses are a large part of the Kazakhstani diet? Some of the dishes include sausages called kazy and shuzhuk made from the meat using the guts as the sausage skin, zhaya made from hip meat which is smoked and boiled, zhal made from neck fat which is smoked and boiled, karta made from a section of the…

My Pitch For A Sequel
Alexander, now in his 40s, is laid off from his job as a telemarketer, gets home to find out his home is being foreclosed on, and then, on his way home from the local pub, runs over a pedestrian and flees the scene of the accident.

Can't we have some sort of factional rap beef to thin the ranks of shitty male rappers?

I saw these guys once
And was pretty unimpressed. Someone in/affiliated with the band gave me a demo, and said to me "We're called Ninja Gun! You know, like 'Have some fun, its Ninja Gun!'"

"entitled to public funding of their entertainment"

Kirk Cameron, this is true. Ever been to Nashville? That city is gayer than a merman orgy.

Maybe "Completely predictable" was what you were looking for?

"3. James the Evil Leprechaun (Jameson Irish Whiskey, Bushmills Irish Whiskey, Tullamore Dew Irish Whiskey, Powers Irish Whiskey "

Stamos' Stamosing was little more than a verbal jab from an oppurtunistic hack.

What about his porn family? Where do they fit into this?

You left out the tertiary syphillis

I dunno how many albums they've sold. I think it's safe to say "a lot". However, that only proves that people like 'em. A lot of dumb people like a lot of stupid shit, so feel free to rest your case, whatever the hell it was.

Sweet Felching Solomon
How much coked-up indignation does it take to write something like this to the NYT? My favorite sentence:

The process is called "Gavage", and causes the troll's liver to have a rich, buttery and delicate flavor.

I saw MF Doom about 6 years ago. He didn't go on until 2:30 AM. The venue had to close at 3. Plenty of shitty unknown MCs before that though, if you're into that sort of thing. The next time he came to town his security people, who Doom insisted work the door, took all the money for the door, including the promoter's…

Would you rather they not get paid for doing no work, all because Sheen just had to have a nuclear porn family with 2.5 kilos?