Mark, man. You play a mean guitar, man. It's really a shame…that you must DIE!

Ooo, that hasn't aired here yet, so I have something completely fucking ridiculous to look forward to.

God damn, that is the best show. The terrible accents from the low-rent Australian reenactors! The wigs! Fucking Candice and her haircuts!

To be fair to her, "Bow Wow" did send her like, $10,000. Your average catfish can't do that.

Last time I was home my mom and sister were super into it.

ANTM is there for all of us in our hour of need.

Same. I remember being actively upset when it was cancelled. Granted, I was a lot younger then, but it worked for me.

To be fair, the Bar Rescue team has no sense of taste. Keep the equipment but lose the mall decor.

I watched one yesterday where the "signature cocktail" involved coffee, some God-awful "new" flavor of Baileys, some other crap, and the garnish was a gas-station cinnamon donut. Why would anyone want that?

I believe every Australian entertainment figure spent some time on Neighbors.

I don't know, I'm much more okay with how much I watch/care about Top Chef or RuPaul's Drag Race compared to Ink Master. There are levels in reality shows, too.

I've always wanted purple drapes.

You know, there are some things your dad just doesn't need to know. Including that you are gay for your car. (I remember that he was very clear on that the car was a boy car.)

I've also never watched every episode of that I encounter. (Holy shit, that amusement-park lady.)

One episode I watched recently was just a very long Heineken commercial.

The Peck vs. Nunez season? (Nicknamed "The Voice of Stupid Fucking Tattoo Show" in my head.) It's just started airing in my country, so I'm watching it as it comes out. So far I like how it has credible female contestants but also that everyone is as terrible and aggro and game-playing as ever. Never change, Ink…

When I used to watch the show, I always liked the moments where we were reminded that Brian was a dog. There was one joke where they talked about Brian bringing in a dead bird to the house, and he got upset and said "that was a gift. That was a gift for the family" in all seriousness.

My British friends are always surprised at how much I know Are You Being Served. For some reason, kid-me loved that show.

I came home from a night out once to find MTV airing Spring Break with Granddad. I guess I'm glad I didn't hallucinate it.

Oxygen or one of those used to show marathons on Sunday. It is the world's best hangover viewing.