My little buttercup, has the sweetest smile.

Hey, if you're a girl with a male's mind, then guys probably will dig you. So there's that.

Hey, I'm a jelly snatch, and not such a bad guy! I can't wait to get up in some girl's shit…

Humping each other, bananas, the subjugation of humankind. The usual shit. Fucking talky gorillas.

I'm stocking up on titty-mags. That shit'll be like gold after the apocalypse.

…and "Grass, Gas, or Ass: No One Rides For Free".

Can I watch?

As did I.

Either one makes me giggly like a schoolgirl.

Perhaps they'll spend the movie vajazzling their vajayjays.

Holy fuck. Christina Hendricks. The current end-all, be-all of womanhood.

Better to read everything in Baron Harkonnen's voice, yes?

It's better she be matched with him than me. My enormous penis would block out the sun, and she would never bask in its eerie and relentless gaze again.

Strumpet, that's why you're Fictional.

I'm really out of touch. I haven't watched VH1 since it was a channel for aging baby boomers.

Red hair has clearly been here for years.

I want to make out with her. She's sweet AND funny. Just like I likes em.

Dammit, AV Club ruined my good joke!

Mmm what smells so good in here??

I wish I still cared enough about the current pop culture to masturbate to it. But no.