1.) But was he cleared for cancer-diabetes AIDS?

1.) The chick basically just admitted she had sex with an underage boy.

1.) Lately all their toothbrush rape tourist dollars have been going to Thailand.

1.) Got a Jameson Whiskey ad on this article. Wouldn't Grey Goose or Stoli have been more appropriate?

1.) This gang threat aspect of Juggalos is totally overhyped.

1.) They got rid of the complimentary snakes because of fucking peanut allergies.

1.) I would not turn down an opportunity to have sexual intercourse with Keira Knightly.

1.) Jet Li looks like he got the HIV in that pic.

1.) My penis is currently wrapped in papier mache.

1.) If I remember correctly, Janie Jones was a popular British whore.

1.) Lono is awesome and never gets the props it deserves.

1.) I would not turn down an opportunity to have sexual intercourse with Amber Heard.
2.) Or let her take a piss all over my face as long as she was fully naked while doing so.

1.) I would not turn down an opportunity to have sexual intercourse with Milla Jovovich.

1.) UB40 Present Arms In Dub is one of the best dub albums of all time.

1.) I'd like to do to her what she did to the music of Tom Waits.

1.) So, the dude who hacked a titty pic of Scarlett Johotness is going to prison and Fred Durst is getting a sitcom? Nice job, America.

1.) What about my accent?

1.) I'm also 'anticipating' taking a shit later today.

1.) There's nothing 'cute' about alcohol poisoning.

1.) How she play guitar with such tiny arms?