T-Bone Streep, I thought we were going to keep our special night in Cabo to ourselves.

No need to snap at him. Just chill out and smoke a doobie. If you need a connection I got the best straaaaiiiinnnnnnssssss!

If you learned anything from my songs, you'd know I always go barefoot…. You'd also know too many margaritas lead to too many whoopsie babies. 

Hey! Are you calling me gay?

I have Carrie Underwood's face tattooed on my belly. Every time I
masturbate she catches one on the chin… That's gotta count for
something.

They should do a movie about me and Andy Warhol. We have so much in common.
1. We both like to get high
2. Food is the focus of our art
3. We both like to get high

Terrible, take a lap…

They're on to me…

*honk*

CancerAids to you too, pal! 

This is just another example of the man trying to brainwash us and keep our eyes blind! Billy Corgan was right, fight the chemtrails… or whatever they're called.

Yet they won't pick up my doc-series, "How to write music about what you're currently eating at the moment."

Throwing Kevin Smith under a bus is more dangerous for the bus than Kevin Smith.

I don't like to eat Atlanta peaches though. I won't touch anything that hasn't been gentrified for at least three years. 

[Comment Removed Due to Puppy Killing]

@avclub-da496e2db2e50a068b4ae5549d4ae1b0:disqus
Is there ever a wrong time or place?

A Pirate Looks at Mustard Fart
We are the Mustard Farts our Parents Warned Us About
Jolly Mustard Fart Sing
Tin Cup Mustard Fart
Changes in Latitudes, Changes in Mustard Farts
Brown Eyed Mustard Fart

Don't you mean ctrl+c and ctrl+v? Without the ctrl+v, the words are lost in space.

Now, is it bad if this doesn't surprise me?

Bands like these have no respect toward music today. We didn't need to blast the "gay agenda" in everybody's face to attract a record. Stuff like this makes me just wanna inject a lethal amount of heroin and shoot myself in the face.