Well, if you were in a situation where you hadn't really met with them before—at first appearance, or if you were covering for somebody else's arraignments, say—the only way you knew they were trans is based on the police report and maybe a brief written interview with an investigator at the jail. And in custody, of…

I like that they moved slow, the way a reanimated corpse would, but when they get ahold of you look out! It's shark week on the front lawn of the school for creepy gifted girls!

"The human lie detector says a lot of things, SHOVE HER."

But she can't persuade anyone else. She's a modern-day Cassandra, basically.

[sniff] Meeeeeemoriieeeeeees …

If it wasn't it sure should have been.

I'm giving it to you, mostly just because you're hip to Haxan.

Like a sort of advent calendar made of rotting flesh.

That was some fast spam deleting AV Club! Well done.

Generally. But it also gets complicated in a courtroom setting since it's a public forum, there's other inmates there, etc. You really want to pin them down personally as to how they'd like you to handle it

Sorry for the confusion H.J. I quit my therapist so I could pay a leather-clad woman to flog me and berate me sexually three times a week. There've been some hickups but overall I think I made the right choice.

Now if you wanted to take me to task for being a whiny little fucker with an egg-shell fragile ego that can't abide a little good-natured ribbing at my expense, well, THAT would be totally legit—wow, I totally just got the joke. I really AM thick aren't I guys?

It's the key to his popularity in the developing world, I'm convinced of that.

Really? There's like, hundreds of thousands of comments on these boards where somebody shares an experience that relates to the topic thinking maybe somebody'll find it interesting or amusing or make them think of some related experience or whatever. Why shit on mine, in particular?

You and Dan Ackroyd.

Well that makes baby jesus cry.

Well in that case, seriously then, can we make this happen?

Would you really want them to play the superbowl? Really? I suspect Ed would have the taste and good sense to say no fucking way.

I think they're great, but 90% of the audience would change the channel before they started playing. And would they agree to do that? I kind of like to think they wouldn't.

They should play exactly the way they do now, but wearing only loin cloths. Ratings would be astronomical.