Apologies
I don't use Twitter, and I know it's a big deal now, but I still see it as just a silly little way for celebrities to get even more attention. So why does everyone feel this need to apologize for every fart-in-the-wind comment that upsets all the dipshits who love to get upset about things? In all of the…

not having a television is pretty awesome sometimes, even though I can't say that out loud without getting a bunch of eye-rolls.

you must be smart—you said, "mea culpa."

why do you insist on ruining the fun of bashing shitty music?

This Shitty
I think the internet should just sweep this under the YouTube rug and forget that it ever happened.

and you didn't once pay for drugs…NOT ONCE

Gen-X
I am not a member of Gen-X and the song in the above video sounds laughably horrible to me. Am I missing something or is it just a generational divide with this band?

Track Jacket
I like how Charlie the character and Charlie the actor basically live in that same track jacket.

Orange County and Margo at the Wedding are the only movies I can think of that used a perfect amount of Jack Black (maybe High Fidelity too). He's way more effective as an odd supporting character. Everything he does in Orange County is hilarious, and it would have been awful without him.

Guinea Pigs
Is it just me, or is this starting to take the shape of some kind of social experiment?

I didn't know that the ET porno was an actual thing that people knew about. All I know is, I was at a Tobacco show at the Triple Rock and the visual accompaniment was just a shitty projection of all things grotesque and/or pornographic, and it featured some very weird ET porn. I love Tobacco, and I have not listened…

"scroungin' around under bleachers, lookin' for asses."

Sorry, Sean. It's your job to create copy and you do it well. But you have to admit that entertainment is largely a business, and the business side of the industry is all about churning out redundant shit as long as the profit margin is correct. That being the case, one could expect there to be at least 7 projects in…

Newswire Headline-o-matic
"There are [number between 5 an 8] [story/character/book that has been around for decades and has built a readymade fanbase] projects in development" (in an industry where the point is to make money by telling stories with familiar characters/themes)

also pretty weird choice for the first video to post in someone's obit. "Hey, we should go with that interview where his character menacingly threatens a woman for merely speaking. " Way to set the tone for his legacy, assholes.

When I told people I was going to a Randy Newman concert, all I got was snickering followed by half-assed re-creations of that scene from Family Guy. Fuck Family Guy, sincerely.

Randy Live
Another possible gateway is just seeing the man play live. His routine set is basically all of the songs mentioned in the article, he sounds just as good in old age as he did in those clips from the '70s, and his stage banter alone is worth the price of the ticket.

Rape Riot
I initially read that as "Tyler, the Creator causes 'rape riot' in Boston."

step off, George.

step off, George.