Nunbags.

Oh, better that her shattered bulk
Should sink beneath the wave;
Her thunders shook the mighty deep,
And there should be her grave;
Nail to the mast her holy flag,
Set every threadbare sail,
And give her to the god of storms,
The lightning and the gale!

It'll be great when Youtube, Facebook and Twitter merge into one company:

I guess what we're all aching to know is: would you do her in a dress, then?

Redman? B'scuze me?!?!? Ya'lls offendenins my Cherokee blood.

She used to be willing to get neked and show us her titles.

SHOW US YOUR TITLES MRS. HOT TEACHER MA'AM!

Her father was secretly gay. And fat.

She used to be a Mormon who worked at Hooter's.

There was a convent down the road from the house I grew up in.

Two nuns are riding their bikes through Florence; there's a detour on their normal route so they have to cut through an old Medieval alleyway. One sister says "I've never come this way beofre." The other one says "Me neither. It must be the cobblestones!"

Ron Gant!

Having good manners while secretly fantasizing about lynching persons of a melanistic complexion ain't good manners. There. How was that?

Hey, I found one!

Tis spelt "Baloney."

May you be killed by hungry children playing games in a childrens book!

O, so now we don't like childrens books anymore?

That's because you're a fully grown man with dropped testes!

"I would heartily enjoy __________ing Fran Leibowitz in her _________atorium."

A Barry Bonds movie would be good, but where the fuck are you gonna find an actor with a misshapen penis? I mean, who the hell could pull that off? That's what she said. I hear it was shaped like a lobster tail.