You fucking pussies and your girl-drinks.

Are we talking REAL velociraptors? Because they weren't nearly as scary as the over-sized killing machines in Jurassic Park. The real ones stood three feet tall and were covered in feathers.

If they were protesting my son's funeral, I would take a SECOND to AMEND the situation with some good old Bronsonesque Libertarianism.

MORE LIKE MARCIA'S GAY HARDON!!!!

H stands for Harold.

The problem is that they have illusions of solemnity. Michael Moore and Vanessa Redgrave get booed for bringing politics into their acceptance speeches because apparently the Oscars are akin to Easter Mass. Well, if it's so fucking solemn then get rid of all the fucking gimmickry. Make the whole thing dead serious.…

You sound like a Midwestern Republican explaining economics at a news conference.

Opening for the Mariachi Owls tonight:

It looks like some of that freaky Ralph Bakshi shit.

As soon as the snow melts I'll be offering a tantalizing variety of soothing herbal remedies through my friendly "neighborhood" cooperative, wink WINK.

BREEDING AGE FEMALE!
Yes!

Yeah, fucking women. I hear ya.

That looks like a dramatic reenactment from MonsterQuest.

Kevin Spacey + David Fincher

Go live out your youthful gaywad fantasy of pretending to be Bobby Darin.

Lemme buy ya a pack a gum, showya how to chew it. Ooooof!

Ewwwwww! It's a Zellweger!
Icky icky icky! Look how FAT she is! Ewwwwe! She's so fat!!!!

As a matter of fap, 'twill flop.

She isn't in more stuff because she too busy being married to some billionaire.

T.E.A.D.O.U.S.T.