work shed

my name isss uuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrrrl

DORITOS LATE NIGHT CHEESEBURGER

Well, I'm a stupid moron with an ugly face and a big butt and my butt smells, and I like to kiss my own butt.

the physical attributes are negotiable as long as she "fully commits" to the role.  i imagine there will be lots of pizza deliveries.

there i was, behind enemy lines.  all of my friends had died.  the year: 1940, and the snow kept falling.  it didn't worry me.  all i had to do was put both cigarettes in my mouth to free up my hands.  after that, i could pull down my pants and lift up the boys to see her there, whistling dixie.  i was a hermaphrodite…

they can't be loud enough, which is a good trait.

me: *handing a copy of Too Dark Park to Ogre to sign*
Ogre: so you like the dissonance of this one?
me: well, i like Last Rights the best, but there isn't a good spot on the cover for a signature
Ogre: Last Rights had some good dissonance on it as well.
me: yes.  you did some good screaming.  the part when Lust Chance…

that applies to basically every song ever.

the live version of "Nervous Xians" is awesome, what with all of the amplifier feedback and pounding beats.  it might even be better than Ministry performing "Smothered Hope" live…
…which seems incomprehensible

THIS IS WHAT THE DEVIL REALLY DOES

he was way better in "Evil Alien Conquerors." that movie is great

…go man go oh brother notanothermotherfuckergonna go now

she's gonna be my cock professor, studyin my dick
she's gonna get her master's degree in 'fuckin me'

Sketches of Winkle is pretty good, but i really liked Woman & Man and basically everything else, including Mourning Glory and the entire Mollusk album.

or maybe Gary Glitter

favorite diarrhea-named album: http://en.wikipedia.org/wik…

favorite diarrhea-named album: http://en.wikipedia.org/wik…

true (lame) story about a dude looking like a lady:
this afternoon i saw a US mail carrier walking into an alcove to deliver mail.  i made a wolf-whistle to be the kind of jerk that whistles at chunky women in public.  the mail carrier turned around and was actually a 40-something man.

it's probably because diarrhea is hereditary.  it runs in your genes.