"Ohhh, who are the people in your neighborhood?/ In your neighborhood/ In your neighborhoo-oo-ood?/ Oh, who are the people in your neighborhood?/ They're the people that you meet each day!"

I just read that in The Bishop's voice.
"We was too late. Elmo got to him first."

The basic Spanish! Learning to count to 10, "abierto!…cerrado!", "Buenos dias!"
Sesame Street alone taught me that as a wee child, and it really stays with you.

I love those little lace gloves. Guess it's impossible for those to come back into fashion. I also wonder why the industry did not make parasols a thing again. They would make a fortune peddling parasol collections because everyone avoids the sun now.

"Shut up, Edith." -Lord Grantham

I'm going to need two extra Red-isms to make up for last week.
In fact, just make every episode about Red going to exotic places for flimsy purposes, smirking and shooting his way out of impossible situations.

Tom just seems like a great guy. And that job he's had for a million years…living the dream.

That's why Joel says, "Live, from your DVR…"
Which is true. Don't know why they do that live gimmick, they always have 30 seconds left at the end. Write some extra jokes, dammit!

Joel's "Hhh-Anywaay…" transitions always make me smile.

Draw!

Pizza and beer is the accepted currency for moving help.

Congrats on your new place! But moving does suck. Do the walls first. Take everything down (pictures, shelves, precious Hummel figurines). Easy to do, and you'll feel better because it looks like you made progress. Pack everything you do not use on a daily basis first. This is a great time to get rid of a lot of…

Most Unbelievable Finding a Place Moment: Two students place an ad to find a roommate, I visit and the house is great. I tell them I want to move in. I have a deposit and first/last ready in cash, right now. They start hemming and hawing: "Well, we have a friend who wants to live here, but he's not sure yet, so we…

Agent Strangelaugh

Agent Vajkick.

Must be the phase of the moon or something. On Saturday I had one of the worst hangovers since New Years'. When I met up with friends later, they all had hangovers, and these are some very experienced drinkers. Every snippet of conversation I overheard involved somebody suffering from a hangover. One friend proudly…

My god yes, this. Get out and volunteer. If you are as politically liberal as you have raged about yourself in the past IK, you will get something out of helping folks non-sexually.
Bonus: You could actually meet a like-minded, nice person at these organizations. My gammy always said, "To find good people, go where…

Hey, who likes the Temptations? 'Cause we've got half of them!

"I'm the bisexual everyone loves to hate because…"
Sorry, I couldn't get past that without slipping into Livia Soprano mode:
Oh, poor you!

Can't stand her pointy face and her always-shrill voice she thinks is acting. I can see her whining to her husband to write good parts for her and wondering why nobody has ever taken her seriously as an actress, "I mean, what is wrong with people, Judd honey? I'm funny!"