as the old folks die, funeral music is provided by Keyboard Cat

if you run out of Vaseline, yes they can

So There's a Lot of Buzz
around this movie?

So What You're Saying Is
If the show starts at 9, don't go in until 10 so you only see the insanely bloody third act bloodbath?

go play with your toys in the attic, fuckstick

Also if you use the name Fokker a German aircraft company will rain bombs down on your ass, so there's that.

Get me Paul Greengrass' non-union Mexican equivalent!!

Future Plans
He should collaborate with Matthew Sweet on some songs because they have similar names.

I saw Guster when they were just Gus, a guitarist and a bongo player engaged in post-college whimsy. Now they're like a Weezer you don't want to punch in the face.

Pretty much every FoW song is about somebody who is deluding himself: he thinks Stacy's mom could love him, he's got a Bright Future in Sales, the girl will like him once he gets a Red Dragon Tattoo.

Ineffectual Canadian
is redundant.

The Comedy Central roasts have brought us one great joke - "I wouldn't fuck X with Bea Arthur's dick" - so yes, they've been a net plus to the world.

look at all you clowns, Coming to America.

good call marrcus. And he could be bouncing a couple titties around during the film.

"Hey Yao, how's that rehabby thing workin' out for ya?"

Fortunately, as long as there are state fairs, you can still enjoy this music in its live form. Exhibit A:

And the weenie bite. Don't forget the weenie bite.

yeah, he's really floundering

if that happened I'd be in a state of excition, that's for sure

Inevitable Pitchfork Review
"The best writing to come out of jail since Martin Luther King's Letter! 8.9!!"