Leaving the Internets
Hey there, I have to stop commenting here for good. It's having too much of a negative effect on me, my family and my job. Good luck to all. Sincerely, Sean Kelley.

It'll be a little tougher without Scarlett Johansson involved, but we'll manage.

it's hype like Excitebike, aiight

yeah, that was sorry-o like Mario

get a lawyer cuz you gonna get Suh'd

Zing
It's going to have a twist ending!

The Director's Cut
is the one with the drug use and transvestites and dudes blowing other dudes, I assume. Because this looks like someone gave Thomas Kinkade some B-roll from Lord of the Rings and a old version of iMovie and said Go to town, Painter of Light.

Is this a sequel
to last summer's tragedy of implosion at the World Cup, "3 Lions"?

TV On The Radio, maybe

a collision course with her own kind?
that can only mean one thing: climactic catfight with Salma Hayek!

Modern Subtitles
How Explaining The Content Of Your Book At Great Length On The Cover So People Don't Actually Have To Open The Book To Know What It's About Changed The World

Can't Wait For Sweeps Week
when "Chelsea" goes to the straight guy's salon to get her hair done for a date with Milo V. and then she asks Milo to sleep with her and he says, "I… can't… sleep" and then she goes back to the hairdresser to complain and he says well I'll sleep with you and she's all like "But aren't you…"…

The OWN Network
would be a lot better if ZMF were programming it.

One Word Review
Dullsville.

"You call that chicken adobo, you dirty Mexicans?!!"

The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, a film so unbearably shitty it drove Sean Connery out of acting altogether.

Completely Unrealistic
For one thing, the young widow would contest the ever-living fuck out of that will. The prodigal son gets the house and the Amish farmland while she gets nothing for all that time spent servicing old-man cock? Talk about your sympathetic plaintiff.

And she was wearing it to church. The confessional was extra busy that week.

actually, it should have been in Dubbly.

Sweet Hereafter 2: Back on the Bus