"…pure cock oil," made me snort at my desk. Thanks for starting my Friday off right, Spacemonkey. And yeah, Rush has to be near the top of the shortlist of World's Biggets Living Asshole.

Toby Keith, Jim Parsons, and Bradley Cooper.

Toby Keith, Jim Parsons, and Bradley Cooper.

I saw a big stack of these books at Costco, with a few people standing around thumbing through copies. One woman had a very large bag of frozen hot wings tucked under one arm. That's the beauty of Costco - you can get your ass-play and ass-spray in one convenient location.

I saw a big stack of these books at Costco, with a few people standing around thumbing through copies. One woman had a very large bag of frozen hot wings tucked under one arm. That's the beauty of Costco - you can get your ass-play and ass-spray in one convenient location.

I don't get the Beats thing either, aside from the sleek design and Dre's name, they're ridiculously overpriced. The Grado SR125i or even the Audio Technica ATH-M30's sound far superior to Beats in my opinion, at a fraction of the price (the AT's are just $60 at Amazon).

I don't get the Beats thing either, aside from the sleek design and Dre's name, they're ridiculously overpriced. The Grado SR125i or even the Audio Technica ATH-M30's sound far superior to Beats in my opinion, at a fraction of the price (the AT's are just $60 at Amazon).

Alison Brie - yet another reminder of how much God doesn't like me, but I don't care. You hear that, God? I don't care! Watch how drunk and stoned I get on your special little day next month! Just watch!

Alison Brie - yet another reminder of how much God doesn't like me, but I don't care. You hear that, God? I don't care! Watch how drunk and stoned I get on your special little day next month! Just watch!

Then there's Good Luck Chuck with Dane Cook. You've got to hand it to him for making people not want to see a movie with Jessica Alba in a bathtub.

Then there's Good Luck Chuck with Dane Cook. You've got to hand it to him for making people not want to see a movie with Jessica Alba in a bathtub.

So does Ibrahim Moizoos.

So does Ibrahim Moizoos.

I can see that, too. It's a safe bet that the only part of the eye he was familiar with prior to the Google search was the "ball".

I can see that, too. It's a safe bet that the only part of the eye he was familiar with prior to the Google search was the "ball".

"…wanted me to shit right on the retina."

"…wanted me to shit right on the retina."

I like to imagine Iggy's wardrobe consists of seventeen pairs of jeans, nine pairs of black leather pants, and the shirt.

I like to imagine Iggy's wardrobe consists of seventeen pairs of jeans, nine pairs of black leather pants, and the shirt.

"omg keh$a's dad is totes hot lol"