It's okay, you can Keep the Glove.

After decades of adulation, you'd think Springsteen would have at least a tinge of the a-hole elitism that, say, a runner-up on any garden variety reality show develops at the first hint of celebrity. But by all accounts he is just a decent down-to-earth guy.

Frito made me laugh, Heche made me snort.

logistician, acai is pronounced "ah-sigh-ee." I can tell from your post you aren't saying it right.

The Northern Mariana Islands have industry? I thought it was just a hideout for rich guys trying to dodge their U.S. taxes.

Haha JVS I had the same reaction: I think it is Burl, though, because it doesn't wax passionately about firsties.

Speaking of those literal video thingies, here's a giggler:

Okay teh dude, say something funny.

Starnberg! *runs away*

"Van who, Grandpa?"

I blame the women for this
As long as you ladies keep believing you can turn douchetards into perfect boyfriends, we will keep getting movies about turning douchetards into perfect boyfriends.

That pulls me right out of my depression, caused by Transformers 2 doing good box office. I like movies again.

Please keep luring Onion writers over to this site
Seriously, I like to hear from them in this extemporaneous format. I also like the opportunity to say thanks for being great in AVC's comments section.

Well, the upside is that low, creepy-sounding voice that introduces each segment is even creepier by comparison.

ZMF, his haters, and his camp followers all have roles to play in the AVC ecosystem, so . . . everybody have a great weekend!

Kate Jackson, the fuck? Unless you are a lesbian, this is nonsensical.

I hate myself for laughing at that.

Nitro's Nitrofessions
For that title alone, you can take the rest of the month off.

scotteb, sad but true.

Jay Mascis will get credit when he earns it — by beating David Cross in Guitar Hero.