"Could I *BE* any more seventeen?"

You mean you people actually watch the results show and don't just DVR it and skip through everything except who ends up in the bottom three and who gets kicked off? Claire, I know you have to because you review it, but I can't imagine why anybody else would.

There were definitely a few episodes of Fantasy Island that scared the shit outta me, the primary one being the one where Tina Louise was in a creepy haunted house and she turned into a horrible old witch (I know, how could you tell?).

Mystery Train

Don't forget Paul Williams as Little Enos. Burt Reynolds' laughter when he wakes up and sees him and Pat McCormick standing there in their matching outfits cracks me up every time.

Looking at the episode guide, it was a three-parter called "Lost in Spain." Three times the terror.

Family Affair
I remember being terrified by an episode of "Family Affair" where the family is traveling abroad (don't remember what country—seemed kind of eastern European in retrospect) and Buffy and Jody get on the wrong bus and are separated from Uncle Bill. They end up all by themselves out in the countryside and…

You're right, that would've been better.

I remember having a bad dream about Lady Elaine Fairchild at least once. From what I can recall, I was basically her slave and she would boss me around and make me perform tedious menial tasks. She was just normal size, though, which is frightening enough.

Yeah, but Tom Petty's in it…playing a postapocalyptic Tom Petty. I thought the movie was somewhat crappy and overlong, but I still liked it for some reason. I think I just like any movie with Will Patton in it.

The commercial for the Anthony Hopkins movie "Magic"
This commercial scared the holy living shit out of me as a kid, so much so that when it was in regular rotation I was afraid to watch TV and kept a blanket near me so I could hide my head under it if it came on. Of course, it was SUPPOSED to be creepy, but it…

Midichlorians. Get the Star Wars references right, alright?

[Singing] All…my…friends.. love the Flo Rida.

@cabin boy: Really? That should be a lot of fun. However, they really should have Karyn Rachtman instead, because she's the one that actually picks the music in Tarantino's movies. Hopefully she'll at least get a shout out.

That reminds me, when Scott was playing the guitar I made the comment to my wife, "Shouldn't he be playing sitting down with the guitar face up on his lap?" Jeff Healey's kind of under her radar so she didn't get it, but at least I amused myself.

A friend of mine theorized that Smokey is Anubis, based on something he read about Anubis being the god of the underworld, weighing the hearts of the souls of the dead to determine their worth. Sounds reasonable to me.

Blindy left. That automatically makes it an A episode.

She obviously got it because she laughed. You can tell because it says "[Laughs]."

He looked like a young Mr. Strickland. "Jeez, didn't that guy ever have hair?"

Goddamn she's gorgeous. I even thought she was hot playing tomboyish (read: "rough") Karen Scarfoli on Freaks & Geeks.