*slaps wsvon's hand*
No!

Most people would be outraged that the rents hookers but…I think we're all just relieved that he's not strangling them.

I think Liar Liar and The Mask are his only straight comedies that have a positive score on Rotten Tomatoes. No, I'm not counting The Truman Show or Eternal Sunshine as comedies. Dumb and Dumber was more of a Farrelly Brothers movie than it was a Jim Carrey Movie.

The posters were about a peeping tom on a skateboard, if I remember correctly.

The blocking the door thing is the only thing that crosses the line for me. The rest is just, "eww, I can see his old man balls."

I'm not sure how that fat man would have gotten to the door before them after he had already sat down and started masturbating…while high, apparently.

I once gave a woman $10 to buy herself a dime bag for christmas.
…she spent it on groceries.

My favorite was when he asked for the bathroom break. I don't remember exactly how it goes but he ended up saying that holding it in could damage your ability to get sexually aroused.
Judge: Is that true?
Jim Carrey: ….it's gotta be.
Judge: …In that case, I better go myself.

No….I'm arguing with a guy on here up-thread because I said siblings shouldn't have children. First he accused me of being a nazi, then he accused me of not liking the mentally handicapped….so, that's happening.

Understood.

Yay!
I'm the cause of something!!

There should be more of that. I generally go for the amateur stuff but…even they're mugging for the camera.
Porn is a bad influence on sex!!

I have no problem with that, honestly. I mean, it's not like they can get pregnant.

(shrugs)
There's a lot of stuff in porn that they think looks cool but, I just roll my eyes at. Everybody complains about how fake the orgasms are but…the great majority of it is just sooo artificial…and does anybody really give a fuck about money shots?! Seriously!

Oh yea, now I get it. I thought the part where one ends up leaving the room while the other finishes up was included in the 95%. Women can finish multiple times though so, that knocks the number down to…probably 82%.

Not enough women for that.

https://www.youtube.com/wat…

I once actually hit two flies with a fly swatter while they were doing it. One of them lived and flew off with the other still attached.

Oh, I thought you were talking about all sex. I thought 95% was too high of a number for all sexual situations.

No, sir. It's about proving to the woman that you're good enough.
(beer helps)