I second the call for a review of the reunion show. There was more drama in that than in the season finale, thanks to the Sammi-Ronnie breakup and the high level of tension between Sammi and JWoww.

I love that Pauly seems deathly afraid of Israel because he's got a cross tattooed on his arm and is convinced that the Jews there apparently shoot Christians on sight or go all Krav Maga on their asses or something. He really ought to be able to safely visit unless he tries to establish a settlement on the West Bank…

One party intervention coming up:

Mike "The Situation" is the Pauly Shore of Jersey Shore.

Considering that his apology would very likely end up being more offensive than the original insult, maybe "audacity" isn't the wrong word after all.

Ronnie, math whiz
Best Ronnie quote of the evening: "It's 4 am. We've been at the club since midnight. Five hours is enough."

As I recall, "Snickers" is projected to eventually mutate into "Oh Henry!"

After writing him off initially as basically useless, I'm coming around to Vinny. I sat down and plotted out a graph rating each of the cast members against two axes: Smart-Dumb and Good-Evil. Lo and behold, Vinny was all by himself in the Smart/Good quadrant.

Also, I've always wondered if that backslap was scripted, and, if so, if Ansara embellished it. The impact is so palpable that Shatner seems genuinely caught off guard and nearly knocked off his feet.

"Out! We need no urging to hate humans, but for the present, only a fool fights in a burning house. Out!" stands out as a particularly cool line when preceded by Kirk's "So … ship out! C'mon, haul it!" and McCoy's "Yeah, out, already!" I always half-expect McCoy to add "Go on — scram!" and huck a rock at the alien…

She kept adjusting and readjusting the boob. I was pretty sure she'd dislocated an implant.

COMPARATIVELY mature. As in, compared to Pauly D and the Situation's relationship.

Speaking of nicknames, I've been fascinated by the morphing of "Snooki" into "Snickers". For that matter, where did "Snooki" come from in the first place? My best guess is that the past and future of the evolutionary process looks like this:

Yeah, the episode where the Situation and Pauly D were actually going at it with women in the same room at the same time was creepy as hell.

I've become a diehard fan of the show purely because of the anthropological angle, frequently describing it as being "like watching gorillas mating."

What I love most about her memorably stupid nickname is pronouncing it "Juhwow".

Grammatically, shouldn't it ought to be "One Fewer Lonely Girl" rather than "One Less Lonely Girl", lonely girls being numerically quantifiable items? Ryan Good may be a hell of a swagger coach, but he's no grammar tutor.

Taylor Lautner and Tom Cruise in a movie about jet fighter pilots? Talk about your Hershey highway to the danger zone.

The recent comedian I immediately thought of who habitually wears a dark shirt against a dark background is Louis CK. This may be because of (a) black's slimming properties and (b) Louis CK's corpulent abdomen, which he describes as a sweaty bowl of flesh with filthy crevices like a theater seat.

One thing that Nickelback does have going for it is that if you ever meet frontman Chad Kroeger, you can probably infuriate him by consistently referring to him as "Chad Nickelback."