But they don't pay you in money.

Agreed. I'd stake my Pulitzer on it.

SOMEBODY SET THE HALLWAY FIGHT SCENE TO FERNANDO!!! I NEED THAT IN MY LIFE!!!

You have anything for Craig T. Nelson?

No, no. Go on.

A-L-B-U-

He is the true Karate Kid.

Whenever I see something screech across the room and latch onto some guy's face and he screams and tries to get it off, I have to laugh, because what is that thing?

That's why those cassettes were all sticky.

"He saw his friend again, and their hug on the beach was a long time coming and- wait a minute, this already got wrapped up with narration. What am I doing here?"

I just finally got myself a copy of this record this year. I regret not doing it sooner. I'm kind of in love with "Nothing Better."

My favorite role of his is in Ghost Rider. Ha! Wouldn't it be funny if that were true?

Attention. Here's an update on tonight's dinner: it was veal. I repeat, veal. The winner of tonight's Mystery Meat Contest was Jeffery Corbin who guessed, "some kind of beef." Congratulations Jeffery, you've won a brand new Chrysler Cordoba, you can pick it up at Morty's office.

"Good morning, campers! Rise and shine, don't forget your booties, 'cause its coooold out there today!"
"It's cold out there everyday, what is this, Miami Beach?"
"Not hardly."

This is just another reason to absolutely love Groundhog Day.

Masturbating, you say?

I was one of them. Granted, I was in the eighth grade.

As long as Michael B. Jordan doesn't touch his per diem, he'll make his grandfather proud.

@avclub-94d8526a5fae933806f65b8a0f49301a:disqus It's a way to "make a personal connection" with your fellow truck driver.

Edgar Wright > Whoever will direct Dr. Strange