I Love You, Amelie Gillette
Amelie, you're so 3008.

I Love You, Amelie Gillette
Amelie, I want you even more than I wanted that goddamn firstie. Fuck.

(Rolls over and lights cigarette)

I Love You, Amelie Gillette
Amelie, URGGHHHH! Ooh. Ooh. Ooh.

I Love You, Amelie Gillette
Amelie, I'm back like cardigan sweaters. The Lover is on the move. Fix thine eyes upon the horizon.

P.S. My soul aches for you.

Amelie, I swear I only hit post once. Don't hate me.

I Love You, Amelie Gillette
Amelie, I've already Fandango'd tickets for the midnight premiere. Since we already know it's gonna be shitty, we can skip straight to the making out in the theater part.

I Love You, Amelie Gillette
Amelie, I've already Fandango'd tickets for the midnight premiere. Since we already know it's gonna be shitty, we can skip straight to the making out in the theater part.

I Love You, Amelie Gillette
Amelie, I've already Fandango'd tickets for the midnight premiere. Since we already know it's gonna be shitty, we can skip straight to the making out in the theater part.

I Love You, Amelie Gillette
Amelie, I'm going to audition for next season of America's Got Talent. In my act, I juggle six flaming swords while simultaneously loving you with all my heart.

I Love You, Amelie Gillette
Amelie, is it weird that when I picture us together you're wearing several day-glo scrunchies and feeding your Tamagotchi? And then you let it die on purpose because the only thing you're interested in nourishing is our relationship?

I Love You, Amelie Gillette
Amelie, I have to apologize for my recent behavior. The pain of not being by your side has really gotten to me. See you soon, honey.

I Love You, Amelie Gillette
Hater + Lover = Hover. Or Later? WHATEVER THE MATH, IT'S ME AND YOU, GOD DAMN IT.

I Love You, Amelie Gillette
Amelie, I know a thing or two about perversion, and let me just tell you—that's nothing.

I Love You, Amelie Gillette
Amelie, you are small, delectable, and perfect. And warm…ooh, so warm.

I Love You, Amelie Gillette
Amelie, you can be Gretel and I can be Hansel. We can wander through the forest and terrorize a geriatric bitch and eat her house and make sweet incestuous love.

I Love You, Amelie Gillette
Amelie, tonight's top ten list: Top 10 Reasons Amelie Gillette Should Be With Me.

I Love You, Amelie Gillette
Amelie, I know you find the Paris Hilton version intolerable, but any chance of Amelie Gillette's My New BFF: My House? In this version, BFF stands for boyfriend forever, and I am the only contestant.

I Love You, Amelie Gillette
Amelie, you would make a hawt D.J. Tanner. I plan on playing Steve, so.