Whoever wrote this, flamingwombat bruther, needs to sleep with one eye open dude, 'cause Hollywood and the nWo are gonna find out who's responsible and shove a tuba up their kiester, jack! WHATCHA GONNA DO WHEN INSTRUMENT RAPE RUNS WILD…ON…YOU???
(rips shirt)
(grunts)
(buys euphonium online thinking it's a tuba)

Lemme tell ya somethin', A.V. Clubbers!!! The Hulkster has been away for quite a while, but he can always hear his name being mentioned, bruthers! Everybody wants to hate on Hollywood because he's been in the movies, man, he's made the money, bruther, and he's on top of the world, jack! Hollywood doesn't know who…

@avclub-c156902f5b20b572848be18c11634dfb:disqus Whatcha gonna do when Hulkamania comes…for…you?

@avclub-c156902f5b20b572848be18c11634dfb:disqus Whatcha gonna do when Hulkamania comes…for…you?

And SEAN O'NEAL! Don't think I didn't see you biting the Hulkster's style, jack! The Hulkster's letting it slide this time, man, and offering you a spot in the nWo, jack! It's gut check time, dude! What's it gonna be, bruther?!?!

And SEAN O'NEAL! Don't think I didn't see you biting the Hulkster's style, jack! The Hulkster's letting it slide this time, man, and offering you a spot in the nWo, jack! It's gut check time, dude! What's it gonna be, bruther?!?!

Who asked you, jabroni?!? You'll wish you were "miles of ahead" of me, bruther, when my boot slams into your face, jack! Whatcha gonna do when a troll-prone senior citizen runs wild…on…you?

Who asked you, jabroni?!? You'll wish you were "miles of ahead" of me, bruther, when my boot slams into your face, jack! Whatcha gonna do when a troll-prone senior citizen runs wild…on…you?

Rest assured, Ricky Coogin bruther, Hollywood Hogan is a brand new man, man! A Hulkster who speaks his mind, jack!

Rest assured, Ricky Coogin bruther, Hollywood Hogan is a brand new man, man! A Hulkster who speaks his mind, jack!

Grow up, bruther!

Grow up, bruther!

"I drink your milkshake, bruther! I drink it up, jack!"

"I drink your milkshake, bruther! I drink it up, jack!"

It is indeed, bruther! The Hulkster's back, jack! The whole Disqus conversion screwed up my "good guy" profile, man! And that made the Hulkster so angry, dude, he turned his back on all his values, jack!

It is indeed, bruther! The Hulkster's back, jack! The whole Disqus conversion screwed up my "good guy" profile, man! And that made the Hulkster so angry, dude, he turned his back on all his values, jack!

Right on the money, bruther!

Right on the money, bruther!

Lemme tell ya somethin', AV Club bruthers! The Hulkster is back, jack, and he's better than ever, dude! The Hulkster has turned his back on the so called "Hulkamaniacs" bruther, and has turned heel for good, man! I'm releasing sex tapes, jack, and just straight makin' stuff up, bruther! Which brings me to my next…

Lemme tell ya somethin', AV Club bruthers! The Hulkster is back, jack, and he's better than ever, dude! The Hulkster has turned his back on the so called "Hulkamaniacs" bruther, and has turned heel for good, man! I'm releasing sex tapes, jack, and just straight makin' stuff up, bruther! Which brings me to my next…