Hello, I'm a talking pig and I'd like to… Wow!  You don't see many Thalidomide victims these days!

Hello, I'm a talking pig and I'd like to… Wow!  You don't see many Thalidomide victims these days!

Ha ha, you said "seminal".

Ha ha, you said "seminal".

Ever since Giuliani, it's been impossible to wallow in my own shit.

Ever since Giuliani, it's been impossible to wallow in my own shit.

I was going to complain, but then I saw your deformed arm and your mastectomy and forgot what I was going to say.

I was going to complain, but then I saw your deformed arm and your mastectomy and forgot what I was going to say.

And "The Long and Winding Road (that leads to my pancreas)"

And "The Long and Winding Road (that leads to my pancreas)"

And I'm guessing it's a pretty impressive wake.

And I'm guessing it's a pretty impressive wake.

She has to be called "Marie Antoinette" since she and all her sisters are called Maria-Something (Maria-Christina, Maria-Amalia etc).  Calling her "Hapsburg" or "Mrs Bourbon" would be just ridiculous.

She has to be called "Marie Antoinette" since she and all her sisters are called Maria-Something (Maria-Christina, Maria-Amalia etc).  Calling her "Hapsburg" or "Mrs Bourbon" would be just ridiculous.

Bit of a howler there - "Antoinette" is not a surname!

Bit of a howler there - "Antoinette" is not a surname!

Tracy Island for me.  Who wouldn't want an enormous sixties pad with a rocket ship hidden under the swimming pool?

Tracy Island for me.  Who wouldn't want an enormous sixties pad with a rocket ship hidden under the swimming pool?

Taken 2: Aslanic Boogaloo

No matter how many times you run that photo - and by now I expect it every time Ms Love is mentioned - my first impression is always that she has a pile of dog shit on her head.