This is all very upsetting.

Do we now live in an alternate universe in which "When It Rains, It Snows" does not exist? DO WE???

"Nowhere Near" from Painful is the best YLT song, and it doesn't even warrant a mention? I'm so frustrated, I logged in.

Kazaam II - ???
Help me out here.

Was that a pun?
Dear God, they're using puns now! Oh, the inanity!

"That weird orphan you adopted"
That made me spit out my coffee.

Dude, they still have Squirrel Girl to work with. That's worth 4Billy alone.

It couldn't be any worse.
Could it?

The best Death album…
is the first Death album, "Scream Bloody Gore."

Cynic
Focus is an incredible record. A lost artifact. Man, I rocked that tape hard.

There, there.

Don't get too excited when you read The Fountainhead
Advice for the ages.

Val Kilmer in Tombstone: "I'm your huckleberry."

It's fargin' war!

Gummo is the watered-down version of Ohio. Don't come here. You'll ruin it.

Varg is free.

Irony?
So does this mean that irony is back? Fuck, yeah. I'm unpacking all of my Ed Wood VHS tapes that I boxed up after 9/11.

Seriously, doesn't anyone look at these moments and go "You know, folks have HD now. They can see this is shit." I guess they wanted us to see it in action so we'd know it was a real sub and not some "Beam me up, Scotty" pod. Bah.

I stood up, pumped my fist and shouted "Finally!" Then my compatriot pointed out that she looked down cause she thought she got shot, too. Me and Kate: Fooled. Goddamn.

West Coast beef must dead, no-ho-ho
East Coast beef must dead, no-ho-ho
Time for us to move ahead, no-ho-ho