AV Club Comments for the past 5 years: blah blah blah Dikachu blah blah blah Dikachu blah blah blah blah

Progressing?
I liked East of the Mountains a whole hell of a lot more than I liked Snow Falling on Cedars. Where does The Other rank in Guterson's oeuvre?

Rank 'Em
SUSPIRIA
OPERA
TENEBRAE
INFERNO
DEEP RED
PHENOMENA
TRAUMA
THE STENDHAL SYNDROME

It's been out on DVD for more than a month, so I figured the statute of limitations on spoilers had expired. No hard feelings, everybody.

Wait a minute!
Isn't that the nun-chucks guy from Ghost World?

Brutal, but satifsying
I heard that the first 20 minutes of this movie mirror the first 20 minutes of Irreversible. Is that just an internet rumor?

Strangers vs. Ils
If the big reveal is "awww, it's just a bunch of kids wanting to plaaaaay", I'm going to be super stoked.

I always assumed the guys who worshipped The Boondock Saints eventually ended up with girls who thought that So I Married An Axe Murderer was the wittiest film on the planet. It makes sense, anyway, in a Mars and Venus sort of way.

You had me at the eerie Glass intro…
I watched The Thin Blue Line in a documentary film class and then saw Fast Cheap and Out of Control at Sundance the same year. And I was sold…….

Locke and Ben are brothers
That's what my supervisor at work says. He claims that both Ben and Locke have a mother named Emily, and that Locke was totally duped by a con artist fake-ass white trash phony mother who coerced him into giving away his best kidney. And that Ben's mother isn't actually dead. Or…

Travers said Finchers was snubbed for a best-director nomination for Seven. I'll always love him for that.

"reading the latest Don DeLillo novel"
or attempting to enjoy a sub-par Michael Keaton horror movie

And I'll form….the head
Still waiting for the Voltron movie.

Look for the typos and bad grammar, the true signs of the real ZMF.

Ashton Kutcher is to movies…
as (blank) is to (blank).

Total Recall
Release Date: 6/1/1990
Domestic Box Office: $119 M

Killer Pad wasn't bad. I mean, not as bad as testicular cancer, anyway.

The extra 20 minutes don't have to be rather painful, Sara. Just use a good lube.

ZODIAC MOTHERFUCKER
JOHNATHAN SCHAECH OWNS! HE WAS SUPERFINE IN DOOM GENERATION

Huh?
Who in the hell is Summer Glau?